They do stay sticking with a daily routine is better for you and helps you to manage things such as depression and anxiety but when the routine also includes an attack from the beast i would rather not have any routines all together. Just when you think things are starting to improve and you are on the road to recovery the beast comes along and kicks you square in the plumbs. Just when i was starting to enjoy a few more days being pain free something had to spoil it. I can only assume its this crazy weather we have been getting for the last couple of weeks. One day is pouring down the next its hot and humid and the next is storms, it just doesn't seem to want to settle. Not only is it making my head play up something chronic but it also trapping me indoors.
Scared to go out in case of a big attack is also something that has been added to my routine and no matter how much i try and stay positive and try to get out and about for a while something seems to stop me. If its not the head and the attacks its the back and the cyst in my lower back playing up. Then when i think things can't get any worst the bowels and stomach decide to join in and have a party of pain and discomfort. What makes things worst is that you have to take medication in order to deal and control these problems and that medication starts problems of its own so you just can't win. If i take paracetamol, or any kind of pain killer to be honest, i end up severely constipated and problems with my stomach and bowels and due to the cyst in my lower left back i end up having trouble opening my bowels as i can't seem to use the muscle on the left side for some reason linked to the cyst itself as when i try it really does hurt.
I have been wanting to get out and do some more fishing the last few weeks but the weather has been against me. Every time i build myself up to go and get organised the weather has changed for the worst and started to rain with high winds. I don't mind it raining when i am fishing i just down want to set up the bivvi and gear in the rain as it will remain damp all the time i am fishing and i will end up catching a bad cold to go with everything else i have going on. At least if you set up before the rain you can nip inside if the skies open and keep dry and continue fishing. I am hoping that this bad spell will shift this weekend and then during next week i can get out and do a bit of fishing at one of the local lakes even if its just a quick day session i need to get out and get fresh air.
I am now waiting for my appointment to see my doctor again as i have been getting some really bad headaches on top of my cluster attacks on the opposite side from my attacks and ear ache on the right side. I have also noticed that i keep getting hot and cold flushes and think i could have an allergy starting again. It could be something to do with the Sodium Valporate i keep trying to take. Every attempt to take the medication has resulted in me becoming very ill or having an allergic reaction to something that we don't know is causing it all. Again i have had to stop taking that medication on the hope that my health will improve again and it looks like i may have to go back on the Pregabilin for a while until i can get to see my specialist at the hospital. I need something to help me battle with the attacks as the injections alone are just not enough. All i can do for now is try and relax and wait until my appointment comes around and hope that the attacks will ease off again soon and i will get some more pain free periods.
