Every morning this week so far have been an early start with the beast waking me up at 3 or 4 am and leaving me in agony for hours after the attack. I am getting pain like you couldn't imagine down the left side of my back and the lump that is next to the spine also on the left hand side is hitting nerves and causing shooting pains right up to the neck. This in turn aggravates the head and can sometimes be bad enough to set off what i call secondary attacks that can sometimes last 2 or 3 hours before the pain subsides. It crazy how nerve pain is so sharp and so painful its like having bad toothaches and abscesses all at the same time but inside where it cant be touched so you cant even rub it or massage it to ease the agony.
Each attack starts the same with a sharp pain above they eye and above the jaw on the left side of my face followed by a sudden break out in sweat. Then the sharp pain comes behind the eye causing it to swell and close and the amount of water that runs from your eye is crazy i can fill a small glass in minuets. As the pain shoots over the left side of the head it causes a ridge to swell up along the path of the pain and then it travels into the neck making it feel like there is something sharp trapped in the bones and each movement is agony and grinds. The head is the worst part of the condition as it makes you want top smash your head against the ground to open it and release what ever is inside causing you all this pain and agony and this can last anything up to an hour and half.
Its really hard to stay focused on the positive things when you are having these attacks and especially when you get the really bad days where up to 8 attacks can come one after each other making you wish that you was dead just so the pain would stop. I am lucky so far this winter as the temperature has dropped and my attacks have stayed steady with only around 2 or 3 days a month being very bad with over 3 attacks but most days are between 1 and 3 attacks and i have been managing quite well. It was only this week they have suddenly become regular again so i am hoping its just the pain in the back causing it to play up and not the beats returning for yet another winter of more pain.
I am so glad i did my Christmas shopping early this year especially after reading about black Friday hitting the UK and the craziness at the superstores with fights breaking out and being so packed you just cant move. I wouldn’t be able to cope with the crowds. Could you imagine me having an attack whilst stuck in amongst the madness inside the supermarket. They really need to get a grip and start the sales earlier in time for Christmas so there isn't such a rush and problem with people arguing and fighting in the store over discounted items. OH well, another year almost at an end and another one just around the corner and i am hoping that my head will improve and keep on improving as it has been over the next few years and maybe go back into remission so i can live a normal life and not one of a hermit.
