Yes its happened! Waking up to the first frosts of the year with frozen windscreens on the cars and a lovely white shimmer to the grass and the feel of it crunching under foot when you walk. This is the sign of the cold weather approaching and a reminder that I have to be careful when going out in the cold. Making sure I wrap up warm and keep my head covered so not to trigger the cluster attacks is usually the first action I take this time of year but for some reason the clusters are staying low. Don’t get me wrong I am very grateful not to be dealing with severe pain first thing when I wake up but it worries me that I could be due for a large attack.
Its really strange how the cold weather has been my main trigger for the clusters for years and every time cold wind blows into my left eye or I feel a freezing cold feeling on the top of my head it would trigger a cluster attack and I would then spend the day having to deal with the pain and the constant after attacks you get when they start. Having anything up to 8 attacks per day each lasting an hour used to take it out of me. Now days they have really decreased and I am seeing 1 or 2 attacks every 3 or 4 days which is great. It would be even better if they would stop all together but I cant see that happening any time soon unless a miracle happens.
Another strange fact about the clusters is when I am out fishing. For some reason when I go fishing, and this does include cold weather, the clusters don’t seem to develop. Whether it is something to do with being able to relax or something to do with the amount of concentration I go into when I am fishing I am just grateful I don’t seem to get as many attacks when on the bank. At first I thought it has something to do with me not thinking about my illness all the time and actually concentrating on fishing and this was why they don’t develop but I have tried doing this with other activities and I don’t get the same results. I thought by keeping myself busy and not actually thinking about the clusters was the key and the reason why they don’t develop when fishing but this is not correct. As to why fishing is one of the only activities I can do with out being in pain all the time is beyond my understanding, I am just grateful I can continue some kind of sport and especially a hobby that I love so much.
This year I am dealing with a new problem now I have been fully diagnosed and after spending the entire 2017 in and out of hospital all the time. As well as the cluster attacks I also have a damaged nerve in the left side of my neck which I have mentioned before in my blog, explaining the amount of pains I get down my back on the left side and in the neck. I first thought tis was referred pain from the cluster attacks and for years I just put up with it. Now they have found out what is wrong and explained that there isn’t anything that can be done apart from a cervical nerve root block that could make me loose the feeling and movement in the left side of my body, so at the end of the day its not an option I want to take and would rather put up with the pain knowing I can continue doing things and still remain mobile. OK I know its another issue I am going to have to learn to live with and I know its a lot of pain to deal with but I do get good days as well as bad and would rather deal with the pain than loose my mobility and independence.
Even though winter is now arriving on our doorstep and the pains continue I am happy to report that my health is beginning to improve. Understanding what is wrong with me and knowing the things I can do to help myself manage the condition is half the battle. For years I didn’t know what was going on but now I see some light at the end of the tunnel. I am just praying the body continues to improve and I am able to get out a lot more than usual. it’s not healthy being stuck indoors for days on end and one reason I love to go out fishing. I find being in the open air, fresh air helps with your health and your moods. Things are starting to look good for the future and I have a few projects that I would like to get started and I am hoping that this is the start of things to come, good times ahead!
