Although this year hasn’t started as cold as last year did i have still noticed the sudden change in temperature and weather and the head is still very sensitive to the cold weather. My attacks are still in the low numbers so i am pleased that they haven’t become as bad as they did last winter and thankful i am now on the right medication but it still doesn't solve the problem that i feel cut off from the world unable to go out in fear of an attack coming even though i have the injections to abort at least 2 of the attacks. The fear of the attack over powering the injection as it has done on many occasion and then having to deal with a full attack out in the open and cold and watching the faces of others as they see you screaming in agony and the sudden fear on their faces as they don’t know what to do or say.
When you try and explain everything is OK its normal they panic and think you are having a stroke when they see the left side of my face droop and my eye close and swell as the pain becomes so bad the ringing in your ears starts to block out any back ground noise and all you can concentrate on is the pain that's running over the top ofy9our head into your neck and behind the eye, like someone is shoving a red hot poker straight through your head. The attack i get are some of the strongest pain i have ever known and i can’t really explain how bad it gets but i am grateful i don’t have to go through half as much i i used to and wonder sometimes how i managed to cope until now.
With another year slowly coming to an end and another Christmas dinner being planned and shopping like crazy to try and take your mind off things i find it just doesn't help any more. I don’t even feel like going out shopping but i know i have to, i have to make an effort to get my life back in order and stop letting the beast control me with fear of the attacks all the time. I have missed out on so much this last year i have made a promise to myself that i would make up for it in 2015 now that the attacks have reduced significantly. I promised myself i would concentrate on my fishing again and get the web site running smoothly with new stories and adventures and start designing a new fishing magazine as i planned. It gives me a goal to aim for and something to concentrate on and that’s what i need instead of giving in to the pain all the time.
It annoys me also that i have problems with constipation and my bowels all the time as that always makes you feel a lot worst than you are. I have just got over a nasty cold that really nocked me for six and that was why i wasn’t updating my blog as much as i used to. I am now getting over the cold and starting to get back into things. My chest still hurts slightly so i may have a small chest infection from the cold but that will clear with the use of some cough syrup. I am booking a quick appointment to see my doctor on Monday so i can discuss my reduction of medication and start coming off all this medication i am on as that doesn’t help me one bit. I should only be taking what i desperately need and nothing else. Also i need to talk to her about removing this fatty lump next to my spine on the left in my lower back as it is causing me a lot of pain and Discomfort and i can no longer sleep on my left side or my back because of it. Hopefully they will opt to remove it or at least try and break it down with medication but at least they best do something as i cant go on with that causing me problems on top of every thing else.
Well that’s my moan and groan for the day and i would like to wish anyone who reads my blog a Very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year and hope that 2015 will be a year that brings you all your dreams and hopes. So Have a Good One!
