Yet again the Beast has decided to pay me a visit in the early hours waking me up with a massive attack. Also i actually dreamt the pain coming on. I don’t know the actual details of my dream as it was very sketchy but i know at one point i was dreaming about the problem i had with my neck and telling someone i had an attack about to start and just as the attack was beginning i woke up into the start of an attack. I jumped out of bed and ran into the living room to take my injection and be near to the oxygen in case i needed it. Thankfully the injection took effect after around 10 – 15 minuets and aborted the attack. I could feel that it was going to be a large one and sometimes the injection just gets over powered by the strength of the pain but in this case i was lucky.
I am not surprised i had an attack as i normally have attacks the day after fishing and thanks to my mother we managed to get in an afternoons fishing at one of the local coarse fisheries. Just before lunch, yesterday, i was talking to my mother on the blackberry messenger when suddenly she said “do you fancy a couple of hours fishing?” well i jumped at the chance and within 20 minuets we was on our way to the lake. John my friend also joined us for the day as well as Brian my step father and we had a great afternoons fishing in the sun as the weather turned out really nice.
Winter is only around the corner and the colder weather is about to hit us so i am praying i get to see my specialist really soon as i am dreading what the winter brings. The cold is the main trigger for my attacks and the onset of the beast and for some reason it is the worst time of year for me. I know i will get lots of attacks every day and don’t know if i can cope with another winter like we had last year. I was getting up to 10 massive attacks in a day and on some occasions i can honestly say i had double that amount. All the attacks were strong ones and it was rare to get the milder attacks during the colder months.
I was walking around with a woollen hat on my head and a thick scarf around my neck just to keep the cold out and stop the attacks from happening. Unfortunately the hat and scarf wasn’t enough to keep the beast from attacking me and i ended up trapped indoors all the time with my face close to an electric heater just to stop the attacks from building. i know this year should be different as i am now on the medication and the Pregabilin does work to a certain extent but extra help is needed if i am to manage the attacks and keep the beast tamed. All i can do for the time being is pray and hope that i get my appointment soon.
My back is still playing up and i am still having problems with my walking and movement. I have to wait for the results of the blood tests to find out what is going on but its hard not to worry all the time as it is a scary thought suddenly not being able to feel your legs. lets hope its something silly like a trapped nerve that can be rectified quickly and not what my mother and the doctor fears it could be. If it does turn out to be arthritis or the sciatic nerve then i am going to need to start thinking about getting a ground floor flat so i don’t have to struggle with the stairs every day. Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that.
