Not only have i been woken by the beast twice this morning in the early hours but now the damaged nerve not only attacks the left side of the head but has also spread into my left shoulder and on my back on the left side and my chest at the front on the left side making me feel like i am having a heart attack when it becomes bad. It doesn’t help that when i get the bad pains and the chest starts i become stressed and start to worry about it making it ten times worst than it actually is. I am also producing wind from the bowels as the IBS starts to play up due to me stressing all the time. I can’t seem to win.
Just when i got things under control and was feeling a lot better as the problems with my bowels seems to have gotten better on its own, possibly due to the medication reduction, also i am no longer getting bad back problems and it has gone back to only getting the walking difficulties once in a while instead of every day. As to why it all blew up out of control i am still no wiser but at least its starting to get better and i only have to deal with the beast and the attacks. I think one illness at a time is enough for anyone to deal with.
I have noticed over that’s few days that the early mornings are getting colder and colder and that is probably why i have been getting so many wake up calls from the beast just lately. i have tried to keep the flat warm between 15 and 19 degrees so it helps to keep the attacks fro appearing. The trouble with this is that it costs a blooming fortune to run the gas constantly so i tend to heat up the flat during the evening and switch it off during the night. This ends up with me being woken in the early hours as the temperature drops and my head feels the cold resulting in an attack or at least strong shadows waking me up so i turn the heating back on.
By using my heating all the time the cost of running the gas has tripled. During the summer months i am lucky to use £5 a week as i am only heating the water i use for washing and bathing, as the autumn started this increased to £10 a week. Now the winter is coming and also the freezing weather this will now increase again to £15-£20 a week just to keep the flat warm enough so i don't get continuous attacks during the day. That’s nearly £80 a month or £320 a quarter, WOW! That’s expensive.
As i am a dual fuel customer of British Gas i have contacted them to see if there is any help they can offer or a discounted cost for disabled people. They do have schemes available for the disabled as my mother is on one as she is also disabled so fingers crossed there is something they can do as i just can’t afford to keep the heating going at that cost. If not i will just have to suffer the early morning attacks and have days where i will have attacks all day long , once again! All this couldn’t happen at a worst time with all the fuel companies increasing their prices and many people complaining that they can’t afford the cost of heating their homes during the winter months. I am just praying i don’t end up like these as i know i will just end up suffering. I don’t know if i can go through another winter like the last one as i was having so many attacks u really don’t know how i got through it all and am still alive.
These early mornings are really taking their toll on me as i am feeling like the walking dead every day just lately. I am having restless nights due to the pains in the neck and the shoulder making things very uncomfortable. While i was getting the wind problems i was getting very little sleep and now even though the wind and bowel problems seems to have calmed down i am still having restless nights. I have tried everything from Vallium to strong sleeping tablets and apart from making you feel groggy all day long they don’t help at all and are a waste of time taking them. The mirtazapine tablets i take for my depression and b-polar are supposed to help you sleep and help you have a natural sleep but i have been on them for so long they no longer have that effect on me.
I was planning on going fishing today as i have been missing it like crazy but with my head and neck they way they are i have had to delay my fishing trip until Friday. I am hoping on Friday to be going Pike fishing with my mate John at our local lake. A few other fishermen have been getting some nice pike from the lake this year so i want to give it a try and see what we can catch. We should get something, either Perch, Pike or Zander (if they are in the lake) are all predators and all go for lures and plugs so it gives us a great chance to try out some of the new lures and plugs i won in a competition from Total Outdoors during the summer. I will also have to write a review of the products we use and the fish we catch using them.
Also a bit of good news as well as my web site “Fishing Adventures Wales” has really taken off and we are getting loads of visitors to the site reading the different adventures we have been on. We have now decided that next year we will be making a film about starting up Carp fishing and we will be filming at different locations around Wales as we visit the different venues. Then at the end of the year we will edit all the footage we get and put together the film so we can release it on our site and in Facebook ready for next Christmas.
